Did we get your attention? Good, because October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and we’d like to help raise awareness for the American Cancer Society by celebrating the best breasts to ever grace the cinema screen.
So before we get to the ladies, please take some time to familiarize yourself with the American Cancer Society’s mission to fight Breast Cancer and do what you can to stop Breast Cancer. Now on to The Fifty Best Breasts in Movie History…
MAE WEST: IN THE BEGINNING
The woman who brought curves to the screen was Mae West, the taboo-breaking Brooklyn-born 1930s wisecracker who plied laughs while shaking her astonishing anatomy. Plenty of men wanted to come up and see her sometime, but Mae’s upper echelons actually helped saved lives in World War II. An inflatable life vest that created oversized flotation power was named the Mae West in honor of the star’s celebrated upper torso.
JANE RUSSELL: MILLION DOLLAR MAMMARIES
Thanks to Howard Hughes’ infantile preoccupation with bosoms, Jane Russell became a star. Hughes’ wildly expensive and lethally overheated PR campaign for Russell’s debut vehicle “The Outlaw” created long-running censorship wars because the marketing campaign played up Russell’s cleavage with too much gusto. Writer George S. Kaufman referred to the Russell promotion as “A Sale of Two Titties,” and all of Russell’s flicks included some sort of bosomy double-entendre (our favorite was for “The French Line”: Jane Russell in 3-D… she’ll knock both of your eyes out!”).
MARILYN MONROE: THE ULTIMATE ICON
Even at this late date, Marilyn Monroe represents the pinnacle of movie star perfection. While her tight costumes showed off her figure brilliantly, we still find ourselves sneaking a peek at the notorious nude calendar photos she posed for in her pre-stardom period. When asked if she had anything on during that legendary shoot, MM replied: “Yes, I had the radio on.” Needless to say, we’re still tuned in to her frequency.
DOROTHY DANDRIDGE: BREAKTHROUGH BEAUTY
Trivia buffs recall that Dorothy Dandridge was the first African-American performer to receive a Best Actress Oscar nomination. Breast buffs also recall Dandridge – for her firm, supple, utterly hypnotic orbs. While everyone knows “Carmen Jones” and her low-cut blouse, check out Dandridge shaking her stuff in the limbo dance from “Island in the Sun.” And how we envy the audiences who attended Dandridge’s classic 1950s nightclub revue, with the star holding up her legendary strapless gowns with a forceful display of anatomy.
JAYNE MANSFIELD: BRING ON THE HOME-GROWN COW JUICE
How the censors ever allowed the sight gag with Jayne Mansfield clutching the milk bottles to her chest in “The Girl Can’t Help It” is the ultimate mystery. But Jayne is easily the ultimate movie mammary mama. Okay, so she was a Marilyn Monroe clone and the bulk of her film work was dreck. But Jayne’s astonishing 40D frontline and her penchant for camp self-deprecatory humor made her a beloved icon in her own right. Today she possesses a superstar aura and her name alone conjures up images of Coleridge-worthy pleasure domes. No wonder Jack Paar presented her on his talk show with the classic quip: “And here they are, Jayne Mansfield.”
SOPHIA LOREN: NEAPOLITAN KNOCKERS
Sporting a jaw-dropping set of 38Cs, Sophia Loren first gained notice in the Rome movie industry with roles that showed off her, uh, talent. Sexy slave girls in ancient costume dramas were her initial specialty, with an emphasis on skimpy costumes (“Two Nights with Cleopatra” and “Aida” come to our dirty minds). Hollywood eventually noticed (how could you miss them?) and her initial English-language roles placed greater emphasis on anatomy rather than acting (the wet dress photos from “Boy on a Dolphin” can still inspire gasps). Sophia eventually was taken seriously, with a well-deserved Oscar for her shattering performance in “Two Women.” But even though she rightfully earned respect as an actress, we’re still salivating over her equipment as a movie star.
See the other gorgeous ladies who made the list in Part 2 of The Fifty Best Breasts in Movie History>>>