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By Doug Brunell | November 13, 2008

The pipe in Pipedream’s Entertainment, purveyor of these films, must be a crack pipe that someone was smoking from when he (and it has to be a he) thought to put the company name on these films. There is nothing about them that comes even a wee bit close to being acceptable.

“The Evilmaker” has a plot that will make your head spin. I’ll just break it down into the basics, as that’s probably how the idea was sold. Four women decide to take refuge in an abandoned house. The Evilmaker stalks and kills them. That description actually makes it sound better than what it is.

The women in this film cannot act, and Im sure the lead got her role because she was willing to bare her breasts at the right moments. Now, her breasts aren’t displeasing, but they are attached to a talentless woman, so they just become decoration. They definitely aren’t worth watching the movie for, either.

The other three leads are no better, as their acting skills seemed to have stopped at the fourth grade. Were supposed to believe their friendship goes back to the high school days, but they never seem all that friendly to each other, and I find it hard to believe they would ever hang out together in the first place. It also doesn’t help that they are given the most ridiculous lines to recite. You can always tell when dialogue is written by someone who thinks he is good at it but has no actual ear for conversation.

Bad acting can sometimes be offset by a good plot. That’s not the case here. The plot is muddled at best. The movie isn’t scary, spooky, or even gory (the last realm a horror movie can mine before failing). Its not even so bad its good. Its just a dog and deserves a swift burial in the graveyard of horror cinema.

The sequel, “Abomination: The Evilmaker II,” is more of the same. The sister (Kylene Wetherell) of one of the victims in the first film decides to find out what really happened at the house. Luckily, I didn’t have to sit through too much as the DVD had a glitch in it that made watching the last half of the movie almost impossible. What I did get to see was more of the same lame story and horrible acting that were hallmarks of the first film.

Tempe Video, which is distributing this movie, has a spotty record. Some of the films it puts out, however, are truly imaginative and noteworthy additions to the genre. These two are not. This double feature actually calls into question the company’s ability to determine what films are worth distributing. Understandably, the company deals with low budget horror films, but just because a film is low budget doesn’t mean it is automatically worthy of Tempe’s name. Advice to the powers-that-be at Tempe: Next time watch the films first before saying yes to putting them out. Maybe that will help you avoid messes like this one in the future.

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