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By Eric Campos | October 1, 2002

We only had a little over 15 years to wait for George Lucas to make another “Star Wars” film, and when he did, I think it’s safe to say that most of us would’ve rather he hadn’t. Yet, The Phantom Menace has stood as the longest, most highly anticipated film in cinema history… until now. It’s been a long 20-year wait, so it’s with immense pleasure (or stomach distress) that we announce a sequel to Turkish Star Wars is in the works. Oh yes, strike up the band, drink that whiskey and smack the donkey’s a*s, cuz it’s time for the Turkish to strike back!

Before we get into the meat of this mess, I’d like to give credit where credit is due and it belongs to Ali Arikan who wrote in after finding a news piece in the Turkish Daily Hurriyet about a sequel to “The Man Who Saved the World,” otherwise known as Turkish Star Wars, and especially known as “The Movie That Jumpstarted the Party.” Ali gave us a translated breakdown of the piece and managed to grab a few juicy quotes.

Not to disappoint the fans any, the dynamic directing team of Metin Demirhan and Cetin Inanc have cast our leading heroes from the original film, Cuneyt Arkin and Aytekin Akkaya, in the sequel. Metin Demirhan produced the original Turkish Star Wars and Cetin Inanc directed, so this new film will be like one big, happy family reunion, kinda like the E Street Band getting back together again…but not.

Metin Demirhan commented on the upcoming sequel, ‘‘We have started the film. We have a story and we are working on the script right now.” A story AND a script? Get outta here.

“We also have people working on models and digital animation. The film will be great fun.” I assume he means that they’ll be stealing some other film’s digital animation.

“We will be filming as many weird planets as possible in derelict areas of Istanbul. We even have a desert planet”. Bet they’re gonna have to bust their a***s to pull that one off.

“This time round, Cüneyt Arkin will use eight arrows at a time instead of four and he will use special Ottoman daggers that emit beams of light.” They should just go ahead and give him the Glaive from “Krull.” Now there’s a weapon that’s proven to rule.

“We are shooting it in the Summer of 2003 and the film will reach the cinemas in 2004. We have sponsors to back us.”

Not to be left out of the hype machine surrounding the yet-to-be-titled Turkish Star Wars sequel, the film’s star had this to say, “In the first film, we made fun of ‘Star Wars’.” No, in the first film, everyone was making fun of you.

“It was an off-kilter project but it became turned into something truly bizarre. To this day, journalists from British and French TV channels come to talk to me about the film; they make documentaries on it. They have no idea what that flick was about either. “ That’s what happens when you rip shots right out of “Star Wars” and mix them with music from “Raiders of the Lost Ark” and “Flash Gordon.”

“If my fans are worried about my age with regards to the action in this film, I can say that it will not be a problem as I do my daily exercises every morning and I am very fit. I can do this very easily.” Uhhhh….

So there you have it, Turkish Cinema has caught sequelitis. Before long, they’ll be remaking their most beloved films, some of which are remakes of American films, which…ah, forget it.

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