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THE PENIS GRADUATION SONG

By Bob Westal | May 6, 2002

Rarely in the history of cinema has a title been more completely descriptive of an entire work.
Yes, “The Penis Graduation Song” consists almost entirely of the word “penis” sung to the tune of Sir Edward Elgar’s familiar graduation-anthem, “Pomp and Circumstance.” There’s a little more, the “singer” is a Max Headroom-Meets-Mr. Clean CGI character and the word’s “c**k, s*****m and balls” are later added for a little variety, but the title really does say it all.
For some unknown reason, it’s actually funny for an entire two minutes. Didn’t Neil Simon write something about “P” sounds being funny in “The Sunshine Boys”?… Or maybe that was just “K” sounds. Anyhow, it works. Then director Alex Roper decides to get his computer generated ya-ya’s out and treats us to a two-minute “psychedelic freak-out” variation on the original. Unfortunately, that segment goes nowhere and takes the taste of “funny” right out of our mouths.
Almost in the same way that Steven Spielberg ruined “A.I.” by going on for an extra twenty minutes after he had found his way to a perfectly great ending, “The Penis Graduation Song” would have been twice as good if it were half as long.

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