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By Phil Hall | November 24, 2006

As Christmas kitsch goes, it doesn’t get worse than the unintentionally hilarious “Santa’s Sing-a-Long!” This cheapjack production features Santa (who looks more like Ben Franklin with a beard) and four elves (played by emetic little girls with green wigs) who scream 14 holiday tunes in the worst off-key manner imaginable. The DVD presentation offers the viewer the choice of on-screen lyrics or a lyric-free screen. Either way, it’s nothing to sing about.

This amateur hour nonsense is interrupted by the guest appearances of the Borscht Belt-worthy jokester Snowy the Snowman (“What holiday songs do monkeys sing? Jungle Bells!”), the reindeers Freddie and Jingle (a pair of moth-eaten puppets) and Mrs. Claus (a young woman in a white wig who recites “The Night Before Christmas” in a voice reminiscent of the Granny character from the Tweety cartoons). There’s even an aeronautic ride in Santa’s sleigh, which is accomplished via computer effects that look as if they were banged out on a DOS program.

“Santa’s Sing-a-Long!” looks like it was shot in someone’s garage. It should’ve been buried in someone’s backyard. The Grinch could use this to encourage a hatred of Christmas, and he would have a cogent point with this as evidence. Ho Ho No!

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