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RETURN OF THE JEDI: SPECIAL EDITION

By Chris Gore | May 12, 1999

Well, you’ll think I’m crazy, but Return of the Jedi is the only Star Wars film that I believe could be IMPROVED by alterations and additions. Unfortunately, the problems with Jedi cannot be fixed even with the best digital software in the galaxy: the weak story (another death star assault, another visit to Dagobah, the exotic planet of the trees, annoying teddy bears), the bad performances (Carrie Fischer actually admitted she was coked-out during the filming of Jedi), the burp jokes (three in the first half hour–I guess I missed the toilet humor in the first two) and Luke’s bizarre-looking hair mop. It’s sad. Ultimately, the third film feels like a tv movie and the middle hour and a half is soooooooo long–it’s all exposition–Darth’s your dad, Leia’s your sister, aaaaaaahhh–end it already!
The last 30 seconds of the film contains a montage of a victory celebration of various Star Wars planets–three actually, Tatooine, Bespin and Coruscant. On Coruscant they topple this colossal statue of the emperor and then they show people in a mosh pit with a Stormtrooper outfit body-surfing across the crowd. (I’m not kidding.) It’s good but then they dub in this new song, an annoying flute-sounding new age song that has nothing to do with Star Wars. (It actually made me miss the “nub-nub” ewok song.) The new dance number in Jabba’s palace is really weak and adds nothing to the film. What was George thinking?
At the screening I went to, one guy actually stood up and cheered when the Ewoks were shown getting killed in the final battle. It was funny.
Well, I must admit, I like playing “Where’s Waldo?” as much as the next guy, and that’s what seeing these new Star Wars movies has been like. A constant inspection for “the new shots.”

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  1. latetotheparty? :( says:

    “im kidding, but seriously this movie is awesome and matches with the storyline completely.”
    No, it doesn’t – Luke’s a full-grown Jedi all of a sudden, and Vader doesn’t wanna overthrow the Emperor anymore. Even the best stuff in this movies doesn’t really “match” what came before.

    Either way RELAX, they’re not bashing the f*****g throne room scenes here. Jesus.

    “There was a real opportunity with the Special Edition to fix a number of key issues with the film”
    LAWL. Doing doing that would’ve required to drastically change the script and film a whole bunch of new scenes with the aged actors. Sure, yea.

    “but instead this cheap looking contractual obligation film is made worse by ‘improvements’ like the unforgivable replacement of a bad puppet band scene with an awful and much worse CGI cartoon band scene.”
    GOOD muppet band scene! Little mistake there… it was tasty, self-conscious camp. It’s good, I liked it – it’s good.

    “Luke knew he could turn into Vader in the previous film (remember the cave)”
    Lol no he didn’t – the idea of turning Vader back only came up in Jedi; the first time it was even sorta implied was their telepathic exchange after the duel.

    “He is just a trigger to get Vader to through an old man down a conveniently placed hole in the floor (what’d if for anyway, ventilation?).”
    Wow, you must really be 5 year old Transformer fanboy if you’re gonna toss complaints like this. Oh gawd no the main hero didn’t smash them all to pieces! Frodo should’ve just thrown the ring down the roaster, would’ve been so much more compelling…

    and yea, what about the convenient bottomless pit in Bespin? Seriously, you suck.

  2. latetotheparty? :( says:

    Well, if burp jokes were good enough for Monty Python…

    and i don’t see how this “flute song” is somehow less starwarsy than the the previous one? when has star star wars ever featured an overjoyed children’s choir chanting something along the lines of “celebrate the fight celebrate the love”, anywhere?
    Now, not wanting to step on its status as a campy, whimsical cult classic or anything, but the selective genre snobbery old grumps keep displaying towards the new song (oh god, anything but world music and new age! that’s like that subculture that believes in crystal balls right) is pretty f*****g annoying tbh. It also creates a very melancholic, bittersweet mood that fits right in with the preceding funeral scene.

    Sorry… a small lapse of taste there on your part, other than that, hey why not 🙂

  3. Chris Stopper says:

    The entire film suffered from GL’s cash grab mentality. You couldn’t write any Empire-like depth into it if your sole intent was to use the film as a leverage for merchandising to the kiddies. Somewhere between Empire (a great science fiction film) and Jedi he had a marketing revelation and Star Wars as a whole was never the same. His agenda wasn’t so obvious during the first hour of Jedi and I was actually with this film; until the teddy bears arrived. Talk about a letdown! The film never recovered.

  4. Brian Combe says:

    Kryton Smith, Ok, wow, where do I start explaining how you are A) rude and B) wrong.
    Jedi has always been a mess of a film and as much a let down as the prequels (though nostalgia usually obscures that obvious observation from most fanboys eyes). There was a real opportunity with the Special Edition to fix a number of key issues with the film but instead this cheap looking contractual obligation film is made worse by ‘improvements’ like the unforgivable replacement of a bad puppet band scene with an awful and much worse CGI cartoon band scene. The 2004 version is even worse still by pasting creepy Hayden’s leering head over Sebastian Shaw’s body.
    Luke knew he could turn into Vader in the previous film (remember the cave) the final scenes had hardly anything to do with Luke. He is just a trigger to get Vader to through an old man down a conveniently placed hole in the floor (what’d if for anyway, ventilation?).

  5. Kryton Smith says:

    Ok, wow, where do I start explaining how you are an idiot. The story was flawlessly built up to the conclusion of luke realizing that he was becoming a future image of his father. His father then saves luke’s life by overcoming the emotional conflict of watching the man he has trusted to rule the galaxy torture his own son. Also, do you know what the word acting means. It literally translates to “the original star wars acting”. (im kidding, but seriously this movie is awesome and matches with the storyline completely.

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