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REJECTED

By Chris Gore | June 17, 2001

Stick figure animations are executed by no one better on the planet than filmmaker Don Hertzfeldt. His work has been part of the [ Sick and Twisted Animation Festival ] and he continues to make audiences laugh until they have trouble breathing with his bizarre looks at life. “Rejected” is no different.
A title card informs us that we are about to see a compilation of advertisements that were rejected by “The Family Learning Channel.” What follows is some of the most twisted s**t ever. Each ad is a quick 15 to 30 seconds ending in the phrase, “You are watching the Family Learning Channel.” The first bit shows a stick figure with a dilemma — stuck holding a giant spoon that is too big to fit into his cereal bowl. He repeats over and over “My spoon is too big.” Quick cut to: You are watching the Family Learning Channel. Next we see a bunch of stick figures wearing hats next to a sign that reads: Silly Hats Only. You are watching the Family Learning Channel. Then we see a stick figure yell loudly, “Angry ticks fire out of my nipples!!!” You are watching the Family Learning Channel. The best is a bunch of gleefully dancing stick figures. Suddenly one proclaims, “My anus is bleeding.” Yes, indeed, blood is pouring from his a*s. “My anus is bleeding!!!” The other stick figures dance, the one stick figure’s butt continues to shoot out blood at an alarming rate. Now swimming in a sea of blood, the stick figure screams, “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, MY ANUS IS BLEEDING!!!!!!!!!!” You are watching the Family Learning Channel.
I can describe it all day, but you need to experience the pure joy that is “Rejected.” Hertzfeldt continues to shock the hell out of us while we laugh our a***s off.

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