Hell, this isn’t even a real slasher. It more closely resembles one of those 1980s suspense thrillers that ripped off slasher tropes to increase box office revenue. We have no campfire tale about the killer here to reference, while even Blood Shack had the legend of “The Chooper.” We also don’t have any substantial body count, less than a handful by the end of the 83-minute runtime. The convention of the final girl, the cornerstone of the slasher genre, gets thrown out here. Girls just want to have fun, but the one outcast who doesn’t is the last one left alive and always vanquishes the killer. Not here. There’s nothing wrong with eschewing tropes or even outright ignoring expected conventions, but in this case, they’re not replaced by anything worthwhile or memorable.
Throughout Sick, Williamson decisively proves that breaking all the rules sometimes breaks the movie. Even though the Williamson brand sucks up all the oxygen, we cannot forget that it was directed by Hyams, who has worked a lot in television. This background ensures that everything is brightly lit, clearly visible, and vividly unremarkable. Yeah, there are a couple of scenes where we see out-of-focus figures sneaking up behind folks, but everything else is visually functional yet dull.
“…the only shiny spot is Adlon’s work…”
The gore effects are nothing we haven’t seen before, with only one barely creative murder included. The limited scope of the production makes Sick the rare instance where a Blumhouse produced film feels as cheap as its budget. The fact that so many other filmmakers who have worked with Blumhouse for the last decade or so have avoided this outward shabbiness is another strike against the crew’s poverty of effort here. Williamson’s inclusion of “spooky” phone shenanigans to portend the killer isn’t a fun nod to his most successful work. Instead, it comes across as dusty as the bookshelves in the cabin here. The COVID angle will please nobody as it adds no insight into how people handled themselves during the lockdown. And we have seen some genius horror movies about COVID, such as Fresh Hell, so it can be done.
Just about the only shiny spot is Adlon’s work as Parker. She gives some of the most realistic character projections seen in this kind of movie. She is multifaceted and unapologetic, defiantly spunky and unconventional. She deserves a much better slasher to be in, as this should have been a major launch for her. As it stands, Sick is a pathetically weak excuse for a fright film that needs to be quarantined immediately.
"…Williamson decisively proves that breaking all the rules sometimes breaks the movie."
