I must, Film Threat readers, claim complete ignorance, for I have not seen Travis Irvine’s original killer raccoon film. This factor, I confess, crossed my mind as Killer Raccoons 2: Dark Christmas in the Dark began. How much would not knowing the players and their origins affect my enjoyment of the sequel? Truth is, in this reviewer’s opinion, not at all. Once, of course, you realize what this movie really is. But more on that later.
The story picks up ten years after the brutal killer raccoon attack at Raccoon Branch Campground, and Yang Miller’s Ty Smallwood, who now goes by the name Casey, has been recently released from prison. Incarcerated for underage drinking, Ty/Casey has lived with loathing and loneliness following his girlfriend’s brutal demise courtesy of a weaponized killer raccoon.
Ty/Casey turns out to have been corresponding with his dead girlfriend’s sister, Darlene (Evelyn Troutman), agreeing to meet up on a train ride to a fresh start, and the promise that Smallwood will reveal how the tragic passing of Tammy’s sister occurred. Only problem our couple has is that there were more survivors from the Raccoon Branch Campground massacre. One of which turned the tragedy into an opportunity and harnessing the power of government-trained raccoon technology.
That survivor is the antagonist of Killer Raccoons 2: Dark Christmas in the Dark, Ranger Danger (Mitch Rose). Ranger is a madman at the heart of an insane plan. They use a raccoon-controlled space-based laser to destroy major U.S. cities in a single blast. Of course, unless the government pays him.
Ty/Casey must put the past behind him, protect Darlene, track down the bad guys, and apply that raccoon-killing ability that saved his life once. All before the space-based laser can be untied with the golden VHS tape, which controls the laser arming codes, converting this orbiting phallus into a veritable Death Star.
A raccoon dressed as an elf holds a man hostage in Killer Raccoons 2: Dark Christmas in the Dark.
“A raccoon-controlled space-based laser to destroy major US cities in a single blast.”
Like I said at the top of this review, for that reason, I was worried. What is Killer Raccoons 2: Dark Christmas in the Dark really? I don’t want to spoil it for you. Because if I do that, that’s all you see, whereas if I keep it vague, and if you are indeed a fan of the film, this is a valentine too, then once you realize what’s going on, you’ll smile. That’s the way it happened to me. And once I realized what Irvine was up to, I found I was grinning from ear to ear.
Aside from that, there’s a truckload of laughs, nods, winks, jokes, and lines of dialogue that I think might well become quote-worthy since this movie is a potential cult Christmas movie classic, enjoyed with lots of seasonal cheer and cold beer. It’s hard to go into too much detail without giving the game away, but I will say that if you go along with the flow once you know where it’s headed, you’ll dig it.
Otherwise, Killer Raccoons 2: Dark Christmas in the Dark is the sequel you never knew you needed which not only pays tribute to the last time a certain action star was famous enough one of his movies got a sequel, but it takes those elements and the insanity of raccoons trained to be killers and stacks it into a bite that’s dripping with grease and cheese to the point you know there’s a heart attack coming, still you chew on, ’cause it tastes so damn good. And Ron Jeremy is in it!
"…a potential cult Christmas movie classic..."
