I’d Rather Be Turned Into Cat Food

Walter Santucci’s animated feature, I’d Rather Be Turned Into Cat Food, presupposes that God exists, but wrestles with the idea that he might be evil by merely observing the world around him. Our tale features a disillusioned man known only as “Human” who lives in a burnt-out, abandoned church after his dreams of rock stardom have collapsed. He shares this space with two puppet-like creatures, Foo and Satchmo, who engage him in a lengthy, darkly comic conversation about the nature of existence. Through their exchange, Human reveals a worldview shaped by deep personal disappointment in others, institutional betrayal, and a total loss of hope, seeing life not as a gift but as a cruel, inescapable burden.

The Muppet-like Foo and Satchmo serve as philosophical foils to Human. Foo, a purple puppet from Detroit, and Satchmo, the group’s persistent optimist, challenge Human’s nihilism. They argue in favor of love, purpose, and endurance in the face of adversity. But their efforts are repeatedly undermined by Humans’ cynicism—he sees love as being manipulated by others, sex as a biological trick designed to keep humanity reproducing. He fixates on the idea that if God exists, He must be malevolent, as every line of thought leads back to suffering inflicted by divine design.

As time passes, their conversation delves into heavy themes such as our corruption of organized religion, corporations, and even Mother Nature herself. Human finds himself in an existential downward spiral, rejecting the idea that God could be good. He grows increasingly despondent as he embraces the idea that the weak must be sacrificed so the strong may survive. The only relief Human finds comes in surreal moments like the satirical number “Doo Doo on a Stick,” underscoring the futility of life.

“A gloriously weird and wildly introspective punk rock puppet show…”

Full disclosure: I’ve been on God’s team since high school. So yes, I don’t necessarily agree with Human’s conclusions. I’m much more upbeat about the world and life—and cats are cute, too. Having said that, I wrestled with this issue myself about why God allows evil to exist, what bad things happen to good people, and the depravity of man.

I deeply appreciated the discussions in I’d Rather Be Turned Into Cat Food. I’m not that uptight Christian who thinks you should never question or challenge God. I’m the exact opposite, as your faith means nothing if it’s not challenged. So bring it on. I’d Rather Be Turned Into Cat Food is a film that is worthy of being wrestled with.

As a film, I love the mixed-media elements—even the puppets. The animation is fun to watch and full of subtext. Just watching the ever-changing face of Human is both interesting and engaging. It might appear sloppy to some, but it all feels very intentional. I should also mention that the acting is exceptional—for puppets. The film works as an engaging philosophical production because the dialogue is natural and, unlike the countless Bible seminars I’ve been to, speaks the language of the common man.

I’d Rather Be Turned Into Cat Food is a gloriously weird and wildly introspective punk rock puppet show for the soul. It’s not here to answer life’s big questions—it’s here to grapple with them using absurdist humor and existential despair. Come for the puppets, stay for the crisis of faith… and maybe leave wondering if the cat food route isn’t so bad after all.