If there’s one universal concept, one common thread that stretches across all sexual, ethnic, socio-economic and religious backgrounds, it’s that everyone finds dating to be a royal pain in the a*s. SUCCEssFUL dating, i.e., actually finding the man or woman of one’s dreams, is an even bigger pain in the a*s. So much so, in fact, that it’s a wonder we humans haven’t “incompatibled” ourselves out of existence.
“Someone to Love,” director Shawn Goldberg’s cynical, slightly amusing short film, examines the dating history of a guy named Max (Goldberg); a fellow whose checkerboarded quest left behind more female victims than the Boston Strangler. We know this because Goldberg, in this film’s best sequence, has assembled all of Max’ past loves in one room and gives most of them a chance to briefly describe the perils and pitfalls of dating this slightly pathetic individual. It’s here, for instance, where we learn that Max’ first sexual experience was with a hooker, thus explaining all his hang-ups in one fell swoop.
We also meet his ex-girlfriend Laura (Susanne Currie), who has little to contribute to the film, as well as his patiently suffering current flame Sarah (Stacey Depass). A bit on the mousy side, Sarah at least has the resigned attitude about her mate’s flaws that, although such a thick skin may be what it takes to make any relationship work, doesn’t make it any less grimly depressing.
“Someone to Love” is an intriguing short that might, if it hasn’t already, find greater success as a one-act play. Indeed, nearly half the film consists of Max, as the narrator and tour guide through his romantic ruins, delivering his tragically amusing monologue while standing in front of a stage curtain.
If this film accomplishes one thing, it’s that it offers up a reassuring reminder that if one’s dating career has been as big a shambles as the Florida Keys after a hurricane, you’re not alone. That’s reason enough to!
love “Someone to Love.”

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