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NAKED TWISTER

By Amy Scott | September 16, 2001

“Naked Twister”. It’s a term that gets used by those Hawaiian shirted, loud-mouthed, wacky guys. You know the ones, they come early, stay late and always break something . The guys who actually buy those clothes you see at Spencer’s Gifts. Everyone knows at least ONE. We knew one who called himself The Boschman. He’d walk in the door and announce himself “IIIIIIIIT’S THE BOSCHMAN!” He called HIMSELF this by the way. The Boschman made us establish a house rule we use even today. No produce Karate.
This is The Boschman of films.
Two couples are playing games and one set gets in a fight. The other couple suggests “Naked Twister” to ease the tensions. Some conversation, some fighting… cut to the chase, three people get naked and stand around talking. We’re talkin full frontal all nudie wangs and boobies floppin kind of naked nude. One guy does leaves his clothes on but he tells a story about how as a teen he jerked off in front of his sister. It’s almost like a super-dirty episode of Melrose Place. Eh, maybe more like a super-dirty episode of Port Charles. Anyway these people are all talky-talk… yappin away saying stuff, but not saying anything, naked bits hanging out all over the place. Then some weirdo guy comes over from next door… at that point, I don’t know what was going on. No, I don’t know WHY it was going on.
Pointless, in your face and only mildly amusing because these people are
naked. Finally after, what… 30 minutes? it skids to a close with an
outrageous, to the hilt, hardcore, film school predictable, plot twist.
I’ll watch naked people do just about anything. Hell, I’ve been known to spend hours at those naked cam websites just watching people clean their apartment. But as anyone who knows The Boschman can tell you, it’s easy to get peoples attention… it’s just what you do with it after you have it that separates the men from the mungos.
We have another rule in the house now. No “Naked Twister.”

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