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By Steve Anderson | May 10, 2007

You know when a movie starts out with a disclaimer that lasts more than five screens, tries desperately to come across as tongue-in-cheek, and involves phrases like “offensive comedy”, you’re probably in for something pointless.

I cite “Dogma” from Kevin Smith. Its setup was largely similar to that described above, and look how that wreckage turned out.

And Bill Zebub is no Kevin Smith.

What Bill Zebub puts forth here is actually kind of innovative. It’s an all-doll action title, almost in the same vein as “Team America: World Police.” Which is a pretty fair idea, but the problem comes in the distinction between the two. The critical difference between the two? “Team America: World Police” had a plot.

What Zebub does with a half-decent idea is nothing short of shameful, stringing together halfassed concepts to make a whole that resembles a gelatin mold on a stick–it just falls apart.

Dude…when you’re showing Osama Bin Laden sodomizing a crucified Pope with his own staff, you have to realize that there’s a difference between scathing social commentary and juvenile, childish antics. And this would NOT be an example of scathing social commentary. Sodomizing the Pope with anything never falls under the category of scathing social commentary. In fact, its a pretty safe bet that any time you’re showing a character getting sodomized with anything, it’s not going to fall into scathing social commentary. It’s a good rule of thumb that sodomy in general doesn’t get very far in terms of scathing social commentary.

In fact, that last paragraph sums up pretty solidly just what’s wrong with “Dolla Morte”. Too much sodomy, and not enough scathing social commentary. Bill Zebub makes social commentary that more befits a mentally ill ten year old than an actual adult director.

Sure, mocking George Bush can be fun and profitable–Michael Moore’s living proof–but there’s a point where attempts at mocking institutions just try too hard to be shocking and wind up being disgusting instead.

And that’s why “Dolla Morte” is a complete failure as both movie and as scathing social commentary.

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