By KJ Doughton | December 27, 2002

Like the “Toxic Avenger” gutting a corrupt, hippo-sized mayor by jamming a noxious hand into the villain’s flabby belly, Troma Films CEO Lloyd Kaufman is throwing verbal jabs as he speaks his mind at a quaint coffee shop on the north end of Tacoma’s Proctor District. “The Sundance Film Festival is bogus,” the outspoken renegade claims. “They hate filmmakers, and they’re not really independent.”

In the take-no-prisoners manner of “Terror Firmer”‘s sexually conflicted killer treating a college numbskull to a beer enema and bong bludgeoning, the Yale graduate and father of three calls Hollywood a maker of “baby-food movies, run by a Satanic conspiracy of elites.”

Like an aggressive Sgt. Kabukiman NYPD zapping a crime lord with his heat-seeking chopsticks, Kaufman scoffs at the Independent Film Channel. “IFC are owned by a giant media conglomerate. They should be called FIF, for ‘F**k Independent Film.'”

Spouting off louder than the draino-chugging, hillbilly son from “Mother’s Day,” Kaufman continues his heartfelt, impassioned rant. “I’m not against the mainstream in general. I’m just against mainstream people who want to erase images of the World Trade Center from Friends. They should erase Friends from the World Trade Center – erase those mealy mouthed little shitheads from that crappy show.”

Get the entire feature and find out what else lies in the mind of Lloyd in part two of CITIZEN KAUFMAN>>>

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