BIG MONEY HUSTLAS

Wow. Who would’ve thunk it? Somebody financed a feature film starring those insufferable whiggers in whiteface, The Insane Clown Posse. Incredible. Just when you think you’ve seen it all, something like this movie comes along and jolts you like a sucker punch in the jimmies.
Although, a punch in the grundies might’ve been more enjoyable than sitting through “Big Money Hustlas”. In case you missed the news, the ICP are a couple of caucasian lads who go by the names Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J. Usually they confine themselves to making bad hip-hop albums and mouthing off on radio programs like “The Howard Stern Show”–which is a perfect forum for their cartoonish idiocy.
This time our heroes have gone the direct-to-video route to inflict their form of entertainment on the masses. The “plot” of this cheapo hackjob is–in essence–that “super cop” Sugar Bear (Mr. 2 Dope) vows to bring down Big Baby Sweets (Violent J) the kingpin of the Manhattan crime syndicate. It seems like a big coincidence that our two leads–who are ostensibly on opposite sides of the law and, in the film, don’t have an abysmal rap group together–are both wearing clown make up.
However, if you can make that gigantic leap of faith, and accept the ridiculousness of these two walking around in public looking like circus performers, you probably expect some entertainment. But what kind? It won’t be musical, because they suck. And if you’re looking for a good comedy why in hell did you choose a movie starring a couple of talentless non-actors? These two couldn’t deliver a line of dialog if their shaggy, mangy, ignorant a***s depended on it. And with cameos by people like Fred “Rerun” Berry, you know that you’re in for a hellish viewing experience.
What kind of an evil, twisted mind comes up with an idea like “Big Money Hustlas”? Haven’t we as a culture stooped low enough yet? Troubling questions, indeed–and there are no easy answers. So, don’t go asking Shaggy 2 Dope or Violent J what it all means. Let’s face it, they’re probably busy formulating what new, insipid load of raw sewage they can peddle to the WWF style suckers out there who buy their crap. Viva Americana!