For every joke that soars, there are ten that are dead on arrival. “Please don’t be that clichéd guy that annoys everybody,” Alex tells Louis. “They always die first, and I don’t want you to die first.” How admirable, for a film riddled with clichés to attempt to satirize said clichés. There are quite a few miscalculated, uncomfortable sequences, such as the one where Zachary shares his dick pics with Brian, or a moment in which a character screams out, “It’s the ghost of Bush/Cheney!” upon seeing an old rally sign moving in the dark.
Useless Humans is not without its merits. There was bound to be a moment or two of inspiration among all these scribblers, after all. There’s a witty montage of Brian’s friends continuously breaking their promise to reconnect annually. Every year is bad for one reason or another, be it marriage or savings – how ironic then, that 2020, of all years, ended up being convenient for everyone to come together. Our heroes exiting a shed with “badass” weapons is a minor highlight, as is Jess clinging to the alien, as it teleports through time and space.
“For every joke that soars, there are four that are dead on arrival.”
Those tidbits are few and far between. An utterly unnecessary subplot follows two female agents in pursuit of the alien. The performances are somewhat shrill, particularly Rushi Kota and Joey Kern’s–unless you’re Will Ferrell, less is more. Josh Zuckerman tries hard in the lead role, and kudos to the actor for attempting to anchor this mess; the effort is palpable. Luke Youngblood is mildly funny, though his character’s obsession with getting wasted turns grating after a while. The standout would have to be Davida Williams, who’s a great sport and boasts spot-on comedic timing.
Indeed, there are plenty of references to Edgar Wright’s irreverent, slapstick-driven Cornetto trilogy. At one point, even The Babadook is referenced during a “swiveling camera” reference to Shaun of the Dead. I wish Ohl, along with his army of enthused creatives, polished the script a few more times, instead of relying on these references. At barely 70 minutes, Useless Humans is not devoid of merit, but neither is it good enough to recommend.
"…unless you're Will Ferrell, less is more."
