Unholy Night

For a Canadian holiday creeper that would make Dominick the Donkey head to the hills in terror, get ready for the Italian strength Christmas horror movie Unholy Night, written and directed by Michael Gabriele. It opens many decades back in the old country, during a big family Christmas. A young girl (Morgan Saunders), while nibbling on holiday treats her poppa snuck her, suddenly starts seeing her relatives hurled across the room. Something is killing the family on the family Christmas, with the young girl thrown into a room to hide while something kills poppa. The film then jumps to the present day, with Gino (Marc Bendavid) getting everything ready for the rest of his family to arrive for Christmas Eve dinner.

Lucia (Toni Ellwand) battles an axe-wielding attacker in the rain-soaked yard in Unholy Night.

“So, with that being the case, why is Gino’s dead grandmother standing up in the kitchen, putting too much salt in the marinara?”

His mother, Lucia (Toni Ellwand) is fussing in the kitchen, while his dad, Giuseppe (Ron Lea) is taking a drop of horse tranquilizer for a headache. Gino answers a knock at the door, expecting more family members to pile in. Instead, he faces Rene (Shailene Garnett), whom he hasn’t seen in years. Gino and Rene dated for a time, but Gino never told his family, as the old-school Italians had a problem with Rene being black. When Gino continues underplaying their relationship in front of his parents, Rene storms off in frustration. Everyone piles in, with the only thing being missed is dear grandma Nonna (Jacqueline Robbins), who is now dead. So, with that being the case, why is Gino’s dead grandmother standing up in the kitchen, putting too much salt in the marinara?

For the record, it is currently Christmas in July here in blazing Arizona, and I feel fine. Some may resent having to review a Christmas picture in summer, but not me. I am Mr. Christmas, and as I bleed peppermint, so I am usually am chomping at the sugarplum this time of year anyway. I even broke out my Jethro Tull Christmas album on double vinyl for the occasion. It is never to early to start compiling your viewing list for the holidays, cause if you don’t, then you are stuck with the same stale gallery of Christmas entertainment that you can recite every line with your eyes closed. You need new infusions in your stockings to keep your Yuletide fresh, so I am here to tell you to get Unholy Night on the list right away.