Deep in the woods, a team of scientists goes hunting for signs of extraterrestrial life. What they find is the cutest little fuzzy alien, blowing bubbles. How can you resist? The lead scientist is overjoyed, so much so that she lets her guard down. That’s when the fuzzy little guy’s not-so-cute demonic alien partner shows up, tears through the entire team, strips them of their clothes, and disembowels them one by one.
Meanwhile, Allair Buck (Keight Leighn) is a shy art student who just wants to find love. Growing up in a cult left its scars. Allair is barely holding on as her sister, Winnie (Lisa Ann Berain), has gone to the other side as a devoted worshiper of Cthulhu. But that’s just silly backstory. Allair has her heart set on Matt Mudwalker (Christopher Michelli), the class’s regular nude model. Everyone in class thinks they’d make a great couple and keeps pushing them together. Soon, Matt musters the courage to ask Allair for a ride home. Finally, the two get their first real chance to talk. As the drive takes them through a well-known nudist community, Allair can’t help herself, calling these people perverts and freaks, only to quickly realize that Matt is a nudist himself.
Embarrassed by what she said, Allair agrees to join Matt for a weekend getaway at a naturist resort to apologize and to understand why Matt is the way he is. Allair is determined to keep an open mind, even if she’s not quite ready to drop her clothes. She quickly makes new friends and becomes less and less apprehensive about all the nakedness around her. But the resort sits right near the woods where those aliens have been hunting humans. As her new friends get picked off one by one, Allair has to decide how far she’s willing to go to survive. Will she finally strip down and fight back?
A park ranger raises a hatchet as an alien lurks in the foggy woods in Naked Alien Massacre.
“But the resort sits right near the woods where those aliens have been hunting humans.”
Naked Alien Massacre comes from our friend Tim Chizmar, and this marks the fourth time I’ve reviewed one of his nudist movies. All with mixed results. But this one is different. It’s his first horror film, and it’s out to accomplish two main goals. The first is to be a bloody B-movie about a pair of aliens who hunt down humans and strip, disembowel, and kill them in the goriest ways possible. Let’s be real, though: this is tongue-in-cheek horror. It’s loaded with jokes and silliness, lots of running and screaming, and a cast of characters that fits every trope of the slasher genre you know and love.
The second purpose is advocacy. From start to finish, Naked Alien Massacre addresses the misconceptions people have about the nudist community and explains why it exists and what being a naturist is all about: people coming together, casting off their clothes and their inhibitions, and building real friendships. You’ll watch a horror movie while learning about the virtues of naturism in real life. All this to say, everyone’s naked in this movie.
Chizmar cleverly weaves these two threads into a horror film with a message. Why are the aliens on Earth? Why are they attacking? And what does any of this have to do with nudism? One moment you’re scared; the next, you’re learning something new. Maybe being a naturist isn’t what you thought it was, and when the aliens come, it just might save your life. The best example of this is Allair. She’s the virginal final girl, and by virginal, I mean she’s the only one at the resort who has yet to take her clothes off. She’s just not ready. The tension is palpable: Will she finally strip down, especially when her life is on the line? Keight Leighn nails it as the sympathetic protagonist, and as crazy as it sounds, we’re right there with her on her journey to full freedom and survival.
For screening information, visit the Naked Alien Massacre official website.
"…aliens who hunt down humans and strips them of their clothes, disembowel, and kill them..."
