It’s impossible for an art thief to be a doughy, acne-ridden schlub. These aren’t carjackers or shoplifters. They’re not in the business of ripping purses out of your grandma’s brittle, overripe hands. Art thieves tilt their heads high to meet their target at nose-level, and they must, for stealing art, require a certain amount of charisma, sex appeal, and pomposity that can’t be found in a pedestrian endeavor like pickpocketing. We’re talking Cary Grant, not the Artful Dodger—that’s kid stuff.
“…struts and frets their hour, until ultimately becoming involved in a Mexican standoff of duplicity.”
That’s what the movies have told me, anyway, and I’m inclined to believe them. I’ve never met an art thief myself, but I suppose he would look and behave like Ivan (Theo James), the main man in Lying and Stealing. I would also assume an art thief to have gathered the attention and alliance of an Emily Ratajkowski type, which he does. And I would certainly assume that an art thief would have established an unsteady relationship with a more seasoned occupational lawbreaker whose character actor appearance has sidelined him from a career in art thievery into a life of counting money, buying hookers, and making veiled threats. For Ivan, this person is Dimitri, who is played by the very good Fred Melamed.
"…stealing art requires a certain amount of charisma, sex appeal, and pomposity..."
