Gnomercy Image


By Michael Talbot-Haynes | September 28, 2021

First off, Gnomercy grabbed me as I’m a colossal Canadaphile, so I was all about the nature shots of Ottowa. I was also looking forward to seeing Jeremy get killed as they already established him as the biggest a*****e on the face of the earth. But then one of the partying Canadians, Carrie (Angela Woodard), tries to flirt with Michelle (Lydia Murphy) by raking a bunch of fall leaves into a pile shaped like an enormous vagina, and I can honestly say that I’ve never seen that done before.

There was also this sinister monologue by a fisherman about the unnatural acts he may perform on the fish he catches before the gnome rams the fisher pole up his backside and out his mouth. There are lots of unique little moments to enjoy while wading through the carnage. The gnome itself is ludicrous, as it’s obviously just some guy with a really bad fake beard that doesn’t even sit on his face correctly. This improves everything even more, as the weakness of the portrayal and kills makes for massive laughs. Co-director/writer Mark White and co-director Colin Jeffrey seem to have intentionally done this.

“…Roman does a decent job carrying out the final girl duties.”

Christina Roman does a decent job carrying out the final girl duties. Jordan Krakower handles the male lead burden well, coming off as a scuzzy breeder version of Ezra Miller. Jeffrey and White, the two men, had the decency to put themselves in smaller supporting roles as football players #2 and #3. Big props out to DP and editor Kyle Woods, who plays the Pizza Delivery Man so amusingly.

Woods did an excellent job with the cinematography and editing, with clean cuts that keep the pace up. If you and your buddies are going to get together to drink an ungodly amount of beer and want something to bray like jackasses to, Gnomercy would be a good choice as that is impulse it was created from.

Gnomercy (2021)

Directed: Colin Jeffrey, Mark White

Written: Mark White

Starring: Christina Roman, Jimmy Leblanc, Nathan Boucher, Milana Hammond, etc.

Movie score: 7/10

Gnomercy Image

"…these projects count as genuine folk art..."

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