DVD OF TOMORROW: A THREESOME (AND A TWOSOME) Image

Over the last few years, Chuck Norris has certainly become quite the pop culture icon. No one really knows why either. Sayings like, “Chuck Norris’ tears can cure cancer… too bad he has never cried,” have found their way into forwarding hell in the realm of e-mail and even would-be hipsters around the office can be heard quoting these idiotic slogans. Well, depending on how seriously these fools take themselves, I have some good news for them.

After a bout with Bruce Lee in Return of the Dragon, Chuck Norris hit up the B-Action genre like many others before him. A majority of his pictures were produced by Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus (also known as the Go-Go Boys), the same producing team behind many of Charles Bronson’s Saturday afternoon action flicks. Some of these films are set to be released in an upcoming DVD boxset titled, “Chuck Norris: American Hero Collection.” This cover means serious business:

Norris.jpg

Look at his gloves just gripping that gun as tight as possible. For under $30, you yourself can own The Delta Force 1 & 2 and the Missing in Action trilogy (actually I think it’s better to call those a ‘thrill-o-gy’) for your personal collection. Does your dad or grandpa have a birthday coming up? This is the sweetest butter of a deal you’ll probably ever find.

We should all be a little sad, however, that Invasion USA isn’t in there. And how they somehow managed to leave out Firewalker, a poor man’s version of Indiana Jones mixed with a little bit of Lethal Weapon, is beyond comprehension. Even further beyond comprehension is the fact that there is a tiny demand for this silly little box set. I want to meet the kid who is going to purchase this up.

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  1. Rory L. Aronsky says:

    Chuck Norris only masturbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.

  2. Felix Vasquez Jr. says:

    Norris doesn’t need words, he speaks with roundhouses.

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