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UNCENSORED SUPERMAN

By Film Threat Staff | August 3, 1998

So a new “Superman” movie will likely never be made and perhaps that’s a good thing after all. But we can still dream what we would say if we were the man of steel…
“Hey bartender-gimme another beer or I’l f–kin’ roast you with my heat vision.”
“Check it out–I can see right through your underwear!”
“You buy, I’ll fly…”
“My farts could knock your house down, pal…”
“You people of Earth make me sick to my stomach…”
“Just touch it–they don’t call me the man of steel for nothing…”
“Jimmy Olsen is such a puss…”
“Hey baby, I can bench press Texas…”
“Everyone in the Justice League is a homo…”
“Batman plays with little boys in tights…”
“Lois is a pain in the a*s, but she gives super head…”
“Krypton? Why, it’s just around the corner from Uranus…”
“You may look at the cape, but do not touch the cape…”
“I’ve got chunks of guys like Lex Luthor in my stool…”

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