INDIE GIRL Q & A WITH HEIDI VAN LIER: WTF LA?

Question:
I’m new to LA – WTF am I supposed to be doing with myself?

Answer:
Here is a little list that might help those indie filmmakers who are new to Los Angeles, or even just coming here to visit, and a nice little reminder for those of us who have forgotten WTF to do with this city:

1. Everyone says they hate LA, it’s boring, stop saying it, we don’t care anymore. (We secretly hate things about it too.)
2. You need to be out, a lot. (Leave your couch.)
3. You need to be ready to get a job if someone offers it to you. (Facebook friend contacts asap and have stuff to send them.)
4. You need to be going to as many screenings as you can get out to.
5. You need to join Film Independent asap and go to all their events. (Call Evan Ward-Henninger in membership asap.)
6. You need to be making films constantly.
7. You need to be writing constantly or coming up with new ideas.
8. You need good titles.
9. You need to take people up on their offers (well most of them anyway).
10. You need to go where you’re invited. (That means actually going, not just saying you’re going.)
11. You need to take care of yourself, so you look like you know how to take care of stuff.
12. If you say you’re going to do something, you actually have to do it. Writing a script, write that script. Making a movie, make that movie. People get tired very quickly of people who just say they’re doing something and never do any of it.
13. You need to stop being a dick.
14. Again, stop talking about how much you hate LA.
15. You need to take care of your car, if your car looks like s**t why would someone give you 2 million dollars to take care of their s**t?
16. You need a mentor.
17. You need to say thank you.
18. You need to know when someone is doing you a favor how much of a favor it actually is.
19. If you don’t know, ask your friends, if they don’t know, don’t ask them again.
20. You need to do lots of favors for everyone you can, then lots of people will do favors for you.
21. You need to not care if people don’t return favors – people will see that you do everyone favors anyway.
22. You don’t need to lie to get jobs, but you don’t need to talk so much about all the times you’ve been fired.
23. Meet your deadlines, and if you’re not going to meet them don’t be such a dick about it.
24. Try and remember peoples names – I suck at this. I met Ashley Judd before she was Ashley Judd and she remembered everyone’s names 4 hours later after being introduced to like 15 people at once. No wonder she ended up being Ashley Judd.
25. Keep your drinking and drugging to a minimum and out of public view.
26. Stop sleeping with everyone. (Unless they’re George Clooney, you know the Clooney Clause.)
27. Someone very close to me said last year that, “it is just as easy to fall in love with someone who has a jet and a Bentley as it is to fall in love with someone who has a beat up Chevy.” I say this is bullshit and disgusting. Date who you love, even if they don’t know Ewan McGregor yet.
28. Sunblock. Daily.
29. Stop telling everyone about every famous person you’ve ever met in your life or run into. (I ran into Chris Nolan and Emma Thomas last night, btw.)
30. Go to every panel and class you can get into.
31. Talk to people on panels, then Facebook friend them or follow them on twitter.
32. Don’t ask dumb questions at panels, you don’t want to stand out that badly.
33. Make more movies.
34. Shut up, you love LA, you know it.

See you at that Starbucks over by that other Starbucks!

Heidi Van Lier is a filmmaker living in Los Angeles. She has directed 3 feature films, with another one on the way. Her first film, Chi Girl, won the Slamdance Film Festival in 1999. She has written a film school textbook called The Indie Film Rule Book, available on Amazon.com. She has been a programmer for the Slamdance Film Festival, and on juries and panels at countless festivals around the country. She has an expensive 8-year-old daughter, send help.