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Chris Gore and Alan Ng review “The Crow,” now playing in theaters.
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0:03
the crow is here this is the remake of
0:06
the
0:07
1994 film based on the James Oar
0:10
comic uh the film starred Brandon
0:13
Lee and it's it it became a cult classic
0:18
I think you know much of the reason for
0:20
that had to do with Brandon Lee's tragic
0:23
death I mean you when you're watching
0:25
the film you're basically seeing a ghost
0:29
because you're like when you saw uh you
0:32
know the dark The Dark Knight with Heath
0:35
Ledger I think that it impacts how you
0:39
see the movie emotionally that you're
0:42
seeing the ghost truly a Brandon Lee in
0:45
this performance in a movie that had a
0:48
lot of other great character actors
0:52
um in in the original Crow
0:55
and I rewatched it uh after I saw this
1:00
because I needed a pallet
1:02
cleanser we will talk about um the
1:05
classic Crow later in contrast to this I
1:09
think what made the original Crow so
1:11
popular is the
1:13
story a you know a a couple madly in
1:17
love on the eve of their wedding on
1:21
Hollow the on Halloween
1:24
Eve where she is
1:27
brutally uh murdered they are they are
1:32
brutally murdered they are yeah the
1:34
young yeah this is not this is the
1:37
original and um then you
1:43
know uh you know he returns basically
1:48
Eric Draven from
1:50
Beyond to take revenge on those who who
1:55
you know killed his the love of his life
1:58
and it's it think it's a real simple
2:01
story that should have been easy to
2:04
translate but this
2:07
remake misses the mark on every
2:13
level uh Bill Skarsgard I think is a
2:16
very good actor this is a terrible
2:20
script that it t you texted me it takes
2:24
an hour to get to where the beginning of
2:28
the original Crow movie began
2:30
let me let me point this out in the
2:32
movie The Crow in this movie The Crow
2:35
what is the first animal you see in the
2:38
movie well I don't even I a horse you're
2:41
right there's a horse the very first the
2:44
opening moments of this movie you see a
2:47
horse in the
2:50
crow the my problem look I
2:55
think it's almost unfair to compare this
2:58
to to make comparisons with this and the
3:01
original because this movie should stand
3:02
on its own but having said that I can't
3:05
help but make comparisons between this
3:07
movie and and the original because at
3:11
minimum what you should have done was
3:12
you take the best parts of the original
3:16
and get that in your movie uh you know
3:18
that that's that's the key to success
3:20
what people liked about the first movie
3:22
you put it in your in your remake and
3:25
you hope people will like that but they
3:27
all it's almost as if they've gone out
3:28
of their way to take everything that
3:30
that worked in that first movie uh and
3:32
and not not bring it here you you know
3:34
mentioned it earlier yeah it takes about
3:37
30 minutes to an hour for this story to
3:39
get to where the crow the original Crow
3:42
starts and it's because we for some
3:44
reason we needed to see 45 minutes of uh
3:48
This Love Story between Eric and Shelly
3:52
um and uh for some reason when uh when
3:56
that first 45 minutes doesn't appear in
3:58
the original we we still somewhere
4:00
somehow figured it out we still somehow
4:02
understood this relationship how
4:05
important it was and why it pushed Eric
4:07
Draven to to the madness that he was to
4:10
the point where when he dies um you get
4:12
into that the classic I'm gonna have to
4:14
read it but once people once beli that
4:16
when they die a CO a crow carries their
4:18
soul but sometimes these deaths are so
4:20
horrific that they stay behind and have
4:22
to kind of avenge things um you know
4:26
that's the heart of the story that's the
4:27
that's the beginning of the story and
4:30
they couldn't capture it all in that um
4:32
the death of Shelly in the first movie
4:34
is horrific yeah brutal it's brutal um
4:39
and I understand why in in modern times
4:42
you can't tell that story they changed
4:45
the circumstances of her death yeah her
4:48
death was so brutal that when she died
4:51
and when Eric died uh the the crow
4:55
didn't carry them off to the to the uh
4:58
the Nether world or
5:00
uh in this one she's killed by a mafia
5:02
hit and it's over something dumb it's
5:05
over a word by the way yeah I don't care
5:09
about this movie and I will cut to the
5:11
chase this movie is a zero out of 10
5:16
except one scene and I'll get to that
5:19
later which brings it up to maybe a four
5:23
out of 10 but it it was it was going to
5:26
zero be she she it's
5:30
so spoilers here she's murdered you know
5:34
this Mafia hit because of a texting
5:37
because of tech she received a text of a
5:41
video but it's there more complicated
5:43
than that but it's literally over a
5:46
video text that she sent that we don't
5:50
she received that she received she
5:51
received yeah we don't want people to
5:53
see it so she has the she received a
5:57
text message and then deserves to die
5:59
now now then you see what later is in
6:01
the video but all of it is so dumb it's
6:05
so dumb and unemotional you're not in
6:09
her mom's involved it's soid here here
6:12
let let me read the line let me read the
6:14
line for I hated this movie I hated this
6:18
movie except for one scene and I'll tell
6:21
you what that is let let me read the the
6:23
line it it says something so bad happens
6:26
that is s terrible sadness is carried
6:29
with it and the Soul can't rest right
6:32
the the something happens so bad it's a
6:34
mafia hit over a video those hit a mafia
6:38
hit over a video Yeah it Stakes the
6:42
stakes were not high enough to justify
6:45
uh the the premise of the movie in the
6:48
in the original the stakes were high
6:50
enough that it Justified this line that
6:54
that the soul couldn't rest and you just
6:56
don't get the sense of that in this one
6:58
the other thing
7:00
the the setting the setting of the
7:02
original is set in a city on the verge
7:04
of Destruction uh there's a gang going
7:06
around burning the city down there's so
7:08
much corruption in the in the in
7:10
politics on the streets uh it's a dark
7:13
World in this one it's an everyday world
7:16
and and quite frankly uh 80% of this
7:19
movie is shot in daylight yeah the
7:22
original the original is shot is mostly
7:24
at night and the city is like a
7:27
character it's it's like Gotham City OT
7:30
there's such a cool vibe to it it really
7:32
feels like at least captured the tone of
7:35
the comic the spirit of the comic was
7:38
captured in the original Crow by the way
7:42
I was so angry after seeing this I got
7:45
home I looked up on just watch the crow
7:49
the original is on Amazon Prime it's
7:51
part of prime it's free but I bought it
7:55
because I wanted to watch it without
7:57
commercials it's on sale for
8:00
I bought the crow in 4k on uh Voodoo
8:04
which is my favorite to buy movies but
8:07
um and I had to watch it because I was
8:08
so pissed off and it was it's so light
8:12
years ahead now there's parts of it that
8:14
are kind of dated that feel dated it's
8:16
very 90s look it's not a perfect movie
8:19
by any means yeah I mean look I I saw
8:22
the original Crow a couple week a couple
8:24
months ago uh beginning of Summer
8:26
through fathom events um it's it's I
8:29
wouldn't call it Masterpiece uh I
8:31
wouldn't call it I wouldn't call it a
8:33
perfect movie it has flaws it has major
8:36
flaws uh Brandon Lee um his performance
8:39
is a bit over the top um little KN that
8:44
he's not alive he's not alive like the
8:47
thing is is there's a charm to the
8:50
original Crow yes uh a lot of it and a
8:53
lot of it has to do with Brandon Lee and
8:54
his performance as weird as it was also
8:58
it's it's an homage to 80s and 990s uh
9:01
violent horror films I mean this the the
9:04
other thing is the set the Set uh the
9:08
you you talk about the city it's all
9:09
practical it's it's a model set versus
9:13
here where again it's set in modern
9:15
times you know there there's something
9:17
about the crow the nature of the crow
9:19
that it needs you need to set it in in a
9:22
a Fantastical location whether it's
9:25
Gotham or whether it's something like
9:26
that but no um you know and um
9:29
again 80% of it is shot in daylight
9:32
which talks speaks to tone uh it's not a
9:35
dark movie if it's not shot in the dark
9:38
um you know and the tone of this movie
9:41
is just off and and I feel like oh uh it
9:46
frustrates me because this is the
9:48
direction of Hollywood movie making
9:50
right now you know they just don't
9:52
they're so afraid they're they're so
9:55
afraid of not being politically correct
9:56
of not being woke of offending people by
9:58
the little thing that it it holds back
10:02
its punches uh and it's um what was the
10:06
other thing the gray was the color
10:07
Choice uh of this movie it's just Bland
10:10
it's bland and and by the way the
10:12
original had uh Ernie Hudson David
10:15
Patrick Kelly from from uh Twin Peaks
10:18
Michael wincott who is a brilliant
10:21
character actor who was in Alien
10:23
Resurrection we talked about that the
10:24
other day and by Ling and also by the
10:28
way I follow bying on
10:31
Instagram I I I like bying anyways uh
10:35
she's uh she's smoking hot in this film
10:38
as a villain Michael wind cot's uh his
10:41
characters like a side piece so to speak
10:44
but the original you're right it's not a
10:46
a masterpiece it's but it is like this
10:50
classic and it was Brandon Lee's overthe
10:53
toop performance it just it's there's a
10:56
tone to it it's it's The Story You're so
10:59
involved and it's and also by the way
11:03
having grown up in Detroit the Detroit
11:05
area Devil's Knight is a thing people
11:09
set fires there are media that come from
11:11
all over the world to cover the city of
11:13
Detroit on Devil's KN because they will
11:16
set three 400 fires in one night look it
11:19
up and that was always the thing devil's
11:21
night was when you know people would
11:23
burn buildings down for insurance okay I
11:26
strange thing but you know it's based on
11:29
that um but I this is so bad now he does
11:35
you know Brandon Lee he's got that sort
11:38
of Wolverine healing ability he learns
11:41
about it there's some you know really
11:44
like gruesome deaths in it the effects
11:46
are fine Brandon Lee as a phys he's
11:50
acting with his whole body and yeah he's
11:52
basically acting against the terrible
11:55
script the worst part is the first third
11:58
of the movie they're in prison it's and
12:01
it's it's so unbelievable they're in a
12:05
uh prison that is co-ed with men and
12:08
women it's kind of like a Psy they wear
12:10
wait wait wait they all wear pink
12:12
jumpsuits it looks so
12:15
dumb like like this is a movie that is
12:18
like uh like a Beloved movie for anyone
12:21
who's goth anyone who who dresses in
12:24
Goth Fashions or is IND goth or
12:27
manscara um this is like a and they wear
12:32
pink and colorful clothes I thought it
12:34
was awful and by the way there are two
12:36
scenes not one two where uh Bill
12:40
Skarsgard puts on the black man's
12:45
Scara two of them and and it's just
12:48
awful but but Bill Skarsgard he's been
12:50
great he was great in Barbarian he was
12:53
great in John Wick for like boy kills
12:57
World I'll throw in yeah boy kills world
12:59
I like Bill Skarsgard and also good
13:03
casting terrible script terrible
13:07
director awful and there is one scene
13:09
I'll tell you what that is okay let me
13:10
let me before you do that let me just
13:12
say the movie is called the crow right
13:16
and the crow doesn't show up until the
13:18
third act I know again again the movie
13:22
opens with a horse uh the the world when
13:26
they die they go they die in water
13:29
um yeah and and again the crow doesn't
13:32
show up until act three in fact the only
13:35
mention of the crow is when they repeat
13:37
the iconic lines at the beginning of the
13:39
films but you don't see a GD Crow until
13:43
the third act which yeah which again no
13:47
one understands how to adapt a comic
13:49
book and no one knows how to adapt a
13:51
movie that had already been made and
13:53
that people love okay go ahead talk
13:55
about the greatest thing about this
13:57
movie okay the one scene kind of like oh
14:01
uh that's kind of a good scene again a
14:03
spoiler in the third Act of the film he
14:06
follows the main antagonist to an opera
14:10
and Bill Skarsgard shows up with a sword
14:13
just to kill and they are all these sort
14:16
of Heavies and uh you know assassins
14:19
that are going to take him out and they
14:22
do not hold back I mean there are some
14:25
really good kills creative kills with a
14:28
sword there's one where he's holding the
14:32
sword against a guy like right against
14:34
his head and the sword goes in his mouth
14:38
and he sort of like slice I mean their
14:40
heads opens the mouth up a bit gives
14:42
them a bit Yeah a bit more than a bit so
14:44
I was like oh shoot this this scene is
14:48
really like the action was good for one
14:51
scene it's maybe like they got it it
14:53
wasn't worth the price to get there
14:56
let's put it yes it's not but they
14:58
probably got a real really good stunt
14:59
coordinator to work that scene out so I
15:02
got I was like oh I'm giving this credit
15:05
so without that without that let me
15:07
finish without that without that scene a
15:10
zero with that scene of four you were
15:13
gonna say yeah I was gonna say that that
15:17
the the final battle was pretty cool um
15:19
but it was a bit over CG as well uh and
15:23
and again that just is a testament to
15:26
the the filmmaker here didn't understand
15:28
what kind of tone they to set and uh
15:30
what did you give it I gave it a
15:32
three so like better than I did I guess
15:36
I gave it a two if you average the zero
15:38
and the four it gets a two yeah so there
15:42
you go oh you're trying to you're trying
15:44
to prove me up by giving I'm gonna out
15:47
I'm gonna outnumber no no you liked it
15:49
better than me let's just say that no no
15:50
I like that scene I like I here's what I
15:54
like I like that scene I like Bill
15:57
Skarsgard I like nothing nothing else
15:59
about this movie I found it so offensive
16:03
yeah I came home I said where can I
16:05
watch the original Crow am I crazy and
16:08
then uh I bought it and I watched it
16:12
after I saw the crow the you know the
16:16
Remake and I I really enjoyed that I was
16:19
like oh now I remember why I generally
16:22
like the film not a perfect film not a
16:24
masterpiece but it really was great in
16:27
tone and yeah if if you like the
16:30
original do not see yeah if you like the
16:32
original Crow this is crap the crow is
16:36
crap yeah
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