Assholes

I’ll just say it. Assholes is a vile, disgusting movie. This genre of gross-out movies get its kicks from splashing the most horrifying images on screen and calling it art. Writer/director Peter Vack brilliantly creates a film loaded with disgusting images and makes it make sense. Assholes’ premise is simple. Take the word, “asshole” and present it in all its glory both literally and figuratively.

The movie opens with an asshole. Her name is Adah (Betsey Brown), and she spends the first eight minutes of the film ranting to her therapist about how bad her life is now that she is sober. She can’t relate to her friends from her old life, and she can’t relate to anyone new. Cut to Aaron, who crudely pontificates to his friends the splendid beauty of the ass. At first, you think Assholes is all talk, but be patient, because it quickly shifts into overdrive.

“Take the word, asshole and present it in all its glory both literally and figuratively.”

Soon Adah and Aaron hook up for an indiscreet session of “butt sex.” Wanting to go to the next level, they find a much-needed boost of energy thanks to an unlimited supply of poppers from the local bodega. Did I mention that Adah also has a raging case of herpes? She does, and Aaron finds out the following morning. Love is beautiful. Assholes show that love can be physically and emotionally destructive, but love nonetheless.

The couple reluctantly realizes they are the perfect match for one another. With mouth and nose ravaged from their herpes inflammation, our couple professes their love by making out during Adah family dinner with her parents (Jane and Ron Brown) and stoner brother, Adam (Peter Vack). Adah’s parents react in disgust, instead of approval, leading Adah and Aaron to elope. For their honeymoon, the pair engages in an amazing drunken assault on the visitors of Time Square. The sequence is a masterpiece in hilarious belligerence. Clearly, the Time Square crowd had no idea what was happening.

“Love is beautiful. Assholes show that love can be physically and emotionally destructive, but love nonetheless.”

Next is a beautifully shot sequence of…ugh…sex and…ugh…ass, ending in the film’s most terrifying moment. I’ll just end here; you just have to see it. Warning: you can’t unsee it. The film continues with several unbelievable moments, and the ending has some really funny fart jokes.

Having been raised as a conservative Christian, I know what my peers would say about this film. It’s not good and they’d be 100% correct. To say that Assholes pushes the boundaries of decency is an understatement. It is hard to make disgusting entertaining. Peter Vack skillfully keeps you engaged with every horrifying action while dancing along that line to makes you want to walk away in hopes of remaining morally pure. This has a lot to do with the two leads, Betsey Brown and Jack Dunphy. No matter how disgusting they are and become, their characters are likable, and somehow you actually think they are in love.

Assholes (2017) Written and Directed by Peter Vack. Starring Betsey Brown, Jack Dunphy, Peter Vack.

4 out of 5

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